Beyond the 6 letters: AUTISM
Before receiving an Autism diagnosis, families may have limited knowledge about Autism and misconceptions about what being Autistic looks like, and these six letters can cause a combination of feelings including uncertainty, fear, confusion, and even guilt.
Autism is often identified in the early childhood developmental period. Autism can be more easily identified if your child presents with the overt or stereotypical features that are usually associated with Autism. However, as every Autistic person is different, there may be certain traits that have been missed in early childhood due to a more internalised, less stereotypical presentation. Yet, as the young person develops and certain demands increase (e.g., social, emotional, academic), Autistic traits may become more evident. For those with a later diagnosis, it may be that medical and health practitioners have already seen your child without understanding that Autism may be present. This can be frustrating for parents as they have often spent enormous funds and time trying to determine what is happening for their young person that is making school, friendships, and everyday tasks more challenging to engage with.
Once a comprehensive Autism diagnostic assessment has been completed and Autism has been identified, you will hopefully be provided with information regarding the strengths and difficulties that your child experiences living within a largely non-Autistic world, their brain style (or neurotype), and how their characteristics are consistent with Autism.
You might feel relief, now that you have finally discovered your child’s neurotype and understand why they have been struggling to thrive in settings designed for non-Autistic individuals.
You might feel grief, that your child may not move as easily through life and may require more support than non-Autistic children.
You may feel dissapointed that your family do not understand or believe the diagnosis.
You might feel confused that your child is Autistic when no professional has identified this previously.
You might feel happy that your child is neurodivergent like you and/or other members of your family.
Whatever your feelings, reactions, and thoughts are about the diagnosis, it is important to acknowledge them, to validate what your body and brain are experiencing and to move (when you are ready) to more deeply understanding your child’s neurotype. With the correct information and support you will likely move toward embracing those six letters which can often develop many positive characteristics in parents such as love, patience, strength, acceptance of difference, understanding and advocacy.
Autism reflects a way that a brain is wired and how information is received and processed. While we view Autism positively, having to navigate life in a world not designed for the Autistic neurotype is not always easy and it is important to focus on the many strengths that an Autistic person has – we all have them – but also recognise and advocate for the different needs of Autistic individuals. Early supportive intervention from a neurodiversity affirming perspective means that instead of viewing Autism as disorder that needs to be treated, you and your child can be supported to understand and embrace their Autistic identity, advocate for their needs, and encourage Autistic ways of being. For example:
They might need to stim, and this can help with feeling more emotionally regulated, socially engaged and ready to learn.
They might need to have the same foods repeatedly (‘safe food’) for certain periods, or daily, which can bring a sense of predictability and comfort.
They might need to fidget and/or look away while talking to you and this can assist them to hear information.
They might need to stay at home, be in their room or engage in prolonged screen time after a stressful/overwhelming situation (social, sensorial, etc.) and this will help to renew their energy so that they can go back out into the world.
Psychological support can also assist children and their families to recognise stimuli in the environment that may cause dysregulation for them (triggers) and can help to create a bank (or toolbox) of helpful accommodations and/ or calming strategies. In addition, psychologists can help young people (and their parents) to learn how to advocate for their needs so that rather than just tolerate certain environments, they can thrive within them.
Remember, Autism is a fluctuating disability so sometimes even after gaining knowledge about it, supporting your child as much as you can, and understanding and accepting their brain style, as a parent you might still feel some of those initial feelings discussed (and others!). You are a human being navigating systems and a world not used to accommodating for different ways of thinking and processing information. We encourage you to:
Connect with a professional who can help you to support your child’s journey.
Join communities in Facebook groups or in your suburbs/city to connect with other parents and keep updated about supports and services.
Engage in your own therapy journey with a psychologist to process and manage your feelings.
Ask for help from your family or friends or if this is not available, begin to engage more formal supports (e.g., domestic support, support workers/ respite).
Through increased understanding of Autism, celebrating strengths, and supporting differences, it is hoped that mainstream settings will feel safer for our Autistic neurokin.
